Message in the Movies: Jealousy and Forgiveness

One thing I love to do while watching movies is to catch messages, especially those I do not agree with or ones that society no longer finds acceptable (or thinks they no longer do). To the trained eye, a singular scene or line of dialogue reveals the social mores of the film's time period. Tucked neatly into the plot, the viewpoints are simply matter of fact, i.e. "this is the way it is," and it's a problem if the character does not conform. Since the viewer identifies with the character, the scene or dialogue sends the message that there is also something wrong with the viewer if he or she does not behave in the expected, "appropriate" way. 


Jealousy is generally accepted and in men often encouraged.

Take Send Me No Flowers (1964). Doris Day's character can't understand and is even suspicious when her husband is not jealous of her college sweetheart. This plot point is resolved when she assumes he is having an affair. You can almost see the thought form across Doris Day's face, No wonder he isn't jealous, he doesn't love me! In The Feminine Touch (1941), Rosalind Russell's character goes to great lengths to induce her husband's jealousy, which she equates with love, and is exasperated when he does not behave as expected. By the end of movie, the lesson is learned as he fights off two potential suitors and she beams triumphantly.  

While men are encouraged to be jealous and women are allowed to be--especially when it results in a comedic escapade (such as The Awful Truth)--several movies incite women to forgive their men's "indiscretions."

Tracy and her father discuss his affair.

In Philadelphia Story (1940), the father explains to his daughter (Katharine Hepburn), "What most wives fail to realize is that their husband's philandering has nothing whatever to do with them." He then blames his philandering on a reluctance to grow old as well as his daughter's lack of idolization of him. Love the movie (put it on to verify the quote and watched the whole thing), but the line kills me every time.

Mary gets some motherly advice
on philandering husbands.

In The Women (1939), the mother of the main character (Norma Shearer) advises her daughter to ignore her husband's affair. She further rationalizes her son-in-law's actions by explaining that she has also experienced a philandering husband. In other words, a cheating husband is a natural part of marriage. When Norma Shearer's character goes through with a divorce, she regrets not heeding her mother's advice, stating that all she has now is pride. In both this film and its 1956 musical version, The Opposite Sex, the woman eventually forgives her husband--pride be damned--and gets him back. The message sent is that it is more important for a woman to look the other way and forgive her cheating spouse than to divorce him and face the world alone. 

Mary  has forgiven her husband
and is going to get him back.

Despite the messages, I still enjoy all of the above mentioned movies. There is much to be praised in plot, witty dialogue, and other thematic messages, not to mention fun, goofiness, and gorgeous costumes. At the same time, it's important to be aware of the subtext in anything one views.

Nod to Adoptive Fathers

Nowadays it seems one can’t go far without hearing about a celebrity adoption. However, adopting children is nothing new. While most will think of famous actresses who were adoptive parents (think Joan Crawford a.k.a. Mommy Dearest), there are many celebrity fathers who have adopted children throughout the years. Since it is Father's Day, I thought it would be a good time to honor a few of these famous adoptive fathers. 

1. Jimmy Stewart 

Stewart and family - courtesy of
Jimmy Stewart: A Biography by Marc Eliot

A search for "Jimmy Stewart with family" results in images and references of Stewart in a number of fatherly roles: It's a Wonderful Life, The Glenn Miller Story, The Man Who Knew Too Much, Mr. Hobbs Takes a Vacation...the list goes on. He seemed to slip easily into these roles, but what many may not know is that Jimmy Stewart first became a father at 41 when he adopted his wife Elaine's children, Ronald and Michael. He and Elaine eventually had their own children, twins Judy and Kelly. All reports point to him as being a wonderful father regardless of whether his children were biological or adopted. 

2. George Burns

George and Gracie Burns with their
adopted children in 1938.

This famous comedian and his equally famous wife and comedic partner, Gracie Allen, adopted a daughter, Sandra, in 1934 and a son, Ronnie, in 1935 when they could not have children due to Gracie's congenital heart defect. According to George, Gracie chose Ronnie because he appeared sickly and needed their help the most. George supported his wife, whom he loved very much, and the result was a beautiful, loving family both on and off paper. When the children were in their teens, they joined the cast of their parents' television program, The George Burns and Gracie Allen Show (1950-1958), and Ronnie went on to act in a few more programs in the early '60s.   

3. Walt Disney

Disney reading to his daughters.

Ironically, the man renown for entertaining millions of children with his cartoons, films, and theme park did not enter into fatherhood easily. This was not because he did not want children; rather his wife Lillian experienced miscarriages and later birth complications that interfered with her ability to conceive. They had one daughter, Diane, naturally and then adopted a second daughter, Sharon. In a 1956 Saturday Evening Post article, Diane describes how her father would complain about being the only man in the house; however he was merely clowning around. He loved his little girls.